In 1 Nephi 16:7 Nephi, his brothers, and Zoram all get married. Lehi had then fulfilled all he was commanded to do and Nephi felt blessed "exceedingly". By the next day, they were off on their long journey in the wilderness with the liahona to guide them.
In verse 35 we read about some of the daughters on Ishmael and their experiences. Their father died while in the wilderness. They grieved, they began to murmur and wanted to return to Jerusalem.
They had good reason to mourn. Their father would not be with them during their journey. It was hard and they did have many afflictions. Why did they murmur though? What is murmuring? What was the result of their murmuring? What happens when I murmur?
As I thought about their response to their afflictions I remembered Nephi's words in 1 Nephi 1:1: "having seen many afflictions in the coures of my days, nevertheless, having been highly favored or the Lord in all my days..." It is not a sin to recognize afflictions. I think this helps us realize part of the difference between letting others know of our challenges and complaining about them. I don't think we have to rejoice in hardships (although we know that having them helps us grow, but being blessed also gives us opportunity to grow). It is okay to mourn because of difficult things that we face. How would we have the opportunity to serve others if we didn't know what hardships they were having?
I guess it comes down to how we discuss our trials. Nephi simply that he had seen many afflictions. He then spoke of blessings. He turned to the Lord for help. I know that having hope and faith that things will improve also helps. The daughters of Ishmael, on the other hand, spoke of their hunger, thirst, and fatigue stating that they were going to perish in the wilderness with hunger. This does not sound like hope or faith to me. It is good for us to know that they experienced hunger, thirst, and fatigue. We appreciate their travels and suffering, much like we do the pioneers, because they are part of our past.
As a side note, in RS this last Sunday a sister mentioned being careful to not spread rumors. Another sister told of her experience when she divorced after only a few weeks of marriage when her husband apostatized. She met another man from her hometown (although she was going to school elsewhere). He proposed and when he went home he mentioned he was engaged to her in testimony meeting. Everyone was upset because this sister's family had not told anyone of her divorce (trying not to spread rumors). This sister was trying to clarify the difference between spreading rumors and giving information. No judgment was passed if her family had told others about the divorce. If they had passed judgement on her or the ex-husband as they told others or tried to guess exactly what happened, it would have been rumors. (Of course, if she had told them not to spread the news that would also have been a different story.)
In my scriptures I wrote the quote, "It is not the conditions people are in that produce happiness, but how they respond to those conditions." I'm sure the daughters of Lehi suffered much too (we will read more later I think) and I bet sometimes they expressed how difficult it was. The problem comes when they lost faith and then chose to murmur.
Murmur (speech), a soft-sounded and quiet utterance/talking "under your breath" so it is hard to understand what the person talking is saying. I looked up this definition to help me recognize murmuring. They murmured against Lehi and Nephi.
One outcome of their murmuring was its negative influence on those who did not have solid foundations of faith. It lead to Laman, Lemuel, and other sons of Ishmael seeking to slay their father and brother. The Lord had to chasten them before they repented. They were then blessed with food and did not perish.
I notice when I start complaining (instead of telling of my hardships, noting blessings, and expressing hope) that those around me are much more likely to join in the complaining and anger. It is a challenge to express trials without complaining or murmuring...something else to work on.
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